We don’t kiss anymore – How do we bring kissing back into our relationship?
A kiss can be one of the most magical firsts in a relationship. However, the longer we’re in our relationship often the kissing fades away this usually happens when kids come along as well.
I want you to have a good look at your relationship, how often do you passionately kiss your partner? I’m talking about after the excitement of Fly-in day!
Has kissing faded away in your relationship?
So Why is kissing so crucial in a relationship?
Science has told us that kissing is how we assess if this person is biologically someone you can have as a partner for life. It influences the way you romantically interact with another. We all now a bad first kiss can make or break a potential relationship.
The act of kissing causes a chemical reaction in the brain, and with this, you experience a rush of neurotransmitters that goes directly to your brain’s pleasure centre.
Sheril Kirshenbaum writes in your book The Science of Kissing “Because a kiss brings two individuals together in an exchange of sensory information by way of taste, smell, touch, and possibly even silent chemical messengers called pheromones (odourless airborne signals), it has the potential to provide all kinds of insight into another person,”
“So even when our conscious minds may not recognise it, the act can reveal clues about a partner’s level of commitment and possibly his or her genetic suitability for producing children.”
So this can be part of the reason why kissing fades the longer you are in your relationship, as it has served its purpose biologically. Nevertheless, one thing we know for sure is that kissing boosts oxytocin (Love Hormone) and feelings of desire. And it is for that reason why you need to make an effort to keep the kissing alive with your partner.
I say, let’s bring back the enjoyment of Kisses again! And get you and your partner reconnect with that young fun hormone-filled teenage inside and get your Kissin on.
Here’s a playful way to get started – Neck Kissing. 💋
Let’s face it, for women and some men; this is one of the most intensely pleasurable areas of the body. Spend a little time here licking, kissing and light biting around the neck, jawline, clavicle bone and shoulders. 😘
Embrace the playful teen inside you and surprise your lover with some neck kisses 😘 However, if you are not there yet, that’s ok Gorgeous!
Here are a few tips that might help you bring kissing back into your relationship.
Dr John Gottman, Ph.D., the love and relationship researcher has come up with one of the simplest ways for couples to revive kissing. It’s called The 6-second kiss! Why 6-seconds John Gottman says “that is the amount of time it takes to make it long enough to feel romantic.” So within 6 seconds of kissing, you are boosting the love hormone.
John Gottman suggests couples start simply by sharing a 6-second kiss each day. And let the kiss speak for itself what I mean is it doesn’t have to lead to sex but if it does great, but that’s not the goal here. The goal is to connect with your partner with a long slow, deep, soft kiss.
I understand that this may be a little awkward at first, and this FIFO lifestyle gets hectic, but this doesn’t mean you give up on kissing.
Here are a few tips to push through the uncomfortableness of kissing:
Set a kissing routine – Yes, setting a schedule to make time to kiss may sound unromantic; however, it will increase the love hormone creating a desire and excitement. If you and your partner decide to kiss for 6 seconds each day of your R&R, this will grow into a beautiful habit of making kissing a critical part of your relationship, and pretty soon you won’t need to schedule it.
Initiate Kissing More Often – If you are the one who wouldn’t usually initiate things and are unhappy with the way your relationship is, take a little control, feel empowered and surprise your partner by making the first move. By stealing a few kisses now and then, it just might motivate your partner to do the same.
Experiment With Different Kissing Styles – One of the reason kissing fades in a relationship is because it became boring, the excitement and arousal were there at the beginning but faded away. Try experimenting with different styles of kissing, or kissing in different surroundings or situations where you usually wouldn’t. Check out our blog – 14 Tongue Tingling Kisses to Seduce your Lover.
Talk About Your Kissing – Communication is the key to a happy relationship. Talk about any concern or feeling you may be experiencing about taking on this 6-second kissing challenge with your partner. Having a chat about kissing is an excellent way to find out exactly how your partner likes to be kissed, and you let them in on what your desires are.
If you both make kissing a priority and focus on being each other “ideal kisser,” you will soon become much more connected, appreciated and loved.
Added Bonus Did you know that A One Minute Kiss Burns 26 Calories!
The next step is for you to try this every day of your next R&R together. Do you accept the 6-second kissing challenge?
If you accept this challenge, and if you’re willing to share, I’d like to hear how it goes for you.
Happy Kissing Gorgeous x