Does Porn Affect Your Relationship?


I received an email asking about porn addiction and its effects on a relationship. They also wanted to know if someone can overcome porn addiction.

Some couples occasionally use porn to spice things up in the bedroom, and this has allowed some couples to communicate what they want openly or would like to try as a couple. This is an issue if porn is used regularly or the only way of spicing things up or being turn-on. Many studies have shown porn to be a massive problem for couples.

Couples who used porn together reported a greater passion in the bedroom at the start.  However, those effects quickly wore off, and the sexual intimacy in the relationship suffered. Porn does damage intimacy. When passion fades from the bedroom, couples think they need to spice it up with different positions, locations, toys and even porn, but the problem is not with what happens in the bedroom but within the heart.

When one turns to porn, they are telling themselves and their partner that he/she is not enough and needs more to be turned on. Which leads to their partner ending up with feelings of hurt, betrayal and inadequacy.  The truth is that when one needs porn to feel turned on, this signals a problem within their brain and not with their partner. Studies have shown that porn is a brain function issue which can cause ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION, Social anxiety, Emotional numbness and many other conditions.

Science has shown that porn and sex addicts have an addiction to the neurochemicals (oxytocin, dopamine, endorphins, serotonin, norepinephrine, and vasopressin) released during porn use and sexual encounters. Porn addiction rewired the brain by creating a new neural pathway.

The good news is research shows that neurochemistry can change and return to normal, healthy levels. If you or your partner is struggling with porn use, please contact your local porn addiction counsellor and expert. To understand how porn addiction affects the brain and relationships, this TED TALK called “The Great Porn Experiment” contains interesting information that will undoubtedly surprise you.

If you are concerned about the amount of porn you indulge in, Psychologists from Eötvös Loránd University in Hungary developed a test that focuses on how porn makes people feel and how they react when they’re taken away from it. Researchers who developed this test have determined that four per cent of people who watch porn are actually addicted.

If you score 76 or higher, you may have an issue with porn and need to seek support before it affects your relationship.

Here are a few helpful services and resources:
MensLine Australia – 1300 78 99 78 https://mensline.org.au/
Relationships Australia – 1300 364 277 https://www.relationships.org.au
LifeLine Australia – 13 11 14 https://www.lifeline.org.au/
https://www.dads4kids.org.au/greatDads_addictions.html#pornography
Porn the effect on man marriage

Disclaimer:  I am not pornography or sex addiction specialist. This article is in no way to identify porn as good or bad, sinful or not, or if it’s considered adultery. This article simply depicts a proven scientific study on the effects of porn.