Is this fifo Life making you feel disheartened and questioning why you are doing it?

Are you overwhelmed by the impact FIFO has on you and your relationships?
 
If that is the case, you might like to consider you might need a little time out for some Self-Love!

As March inspires us to celebrate International Women’s Day, I have decided that we focus on filling our love tank by making March the “Month of Celebrating Women”, Including You!  

This FIFO Life can make you feel disheartened, question why you are doing it, and make you feel very lonely. Does this feel like you? Just know that you are not alone, Sister! 

If you want to start to feel more connected with the fun, happy version of you, keep reading as I’m going to share with you how you can use the 5 love languages not only in your relationship but to fill up your self-love tank to have you feel empowered and let your fun confident side shine!

According to Chapman, the five ways to express and experience love called “love languages” are:

Words of Affirmation. Expressing affection through spoken affection, praise or appreciation. 

Think Self Love – Practice Daily Empowering Affirmations, Journal your Strengths and Successes, Mindful Positive Self-Talk and Gratitude towards Others and Yourself.

Acts of Service. Cooking a meal, washing dishes, taking out the garbage, mowing the lawn, changing the baby’s diaper, painting the bedroom, etc. If this is your spouse’s primary love language, nothing speaks as loudly as these acts of service.

Demonstrate Self-Love – Prepare Healthy Meals, Schedule Health Check-Ups, Planning-Organising and Delegating Chores, Pampering Yourself with Love and Living Purposely.

Receiving Gifts. It means you feel the love from all those small presents your partner gets you! Many people may assume receiving gifts is materialistic and all about the items, but that isn’t necessarily true.

Absorb Self-Love – Gift Yourself with an Experience, Invest in Knowledge and Education for Yourself, Treat Yourself to Travel, and Buy Only what You Love and can afford, sparking Joy. 

Quality Time. Giving someone your undivided attention. … I mean sitting on the couch with the TV off, looking at each other and talking, and giving each other your undivided attention.

Be Present with Self-Love – Engage in Meditation and Mindfulness, Take Yourself on a Date, Prioritize Sleep & Exercise, Engage in a Creative Passion, Spend Time in Nature, and Read a Book.

Physical Touch. Nonverbal love language people use to let others know they are cherished. The physical nature of this language leads some people to think it’s simply about satisfying sensual needs, but desiring physical touch is usually more about feeling seen and safe than about intercourse.

Feel Self-Love – Honour Your Body by doing things that Feel Good, Yoga, Stretch Your Muscles, Take Detoxifying Baths or Hot Showers, Schedule a Spa Day or Massage, and Pamper Yourself.

Self-love is a journey; it will take dedication and practice to love yourself daily. Taking the time to cultivate self-love and become your own best friend will be the most powerful and worthwhile endeavours you make. Create a loving relationship with yourself and watch your best self blossom!

We don’t kiss anymore – How do we bring kissing back into our relationship?

A kiss can be one of the most magical firsts in a relationship. However, the longer we’re in our relationship often, the kissing fades away. This usually happens when kids come along as well.

I want you to have a good look at your relationship. How often do you passionately kiss your partner? I’m talking about after the excitement of Fly-in day!

Has kissing faded away in your relationship?

So Why is kissing so crucial in a relationship?

Science has told us that kissing is how we assess if this person is biologically someone we can have as a partner for life. It influences the way you romantically interact with another. A bad first kiss can make or break a potential relationship.

The act of kissing causes a chemical reaction in the brain, and with this, you experience a rush of neurotransmitters that goes directly to your brain’s pleasure centre.

Sheril Kirshenbaum writes in your book The Science of Kissing, “Because a kiss brings two individuals together in an exchange of sensory information by way of taste, smell, touch, and possibly even silent chemical messengers called pheromones (odourless airborne signals), it has the potential to provide all kinds of insight into another person,”

“So even when our conscious minds may not recognise it, the act can reveal clues about a partner’s level of commitment and possibly his or her genetic suitability for producing children.”

So this can be part of why kissing fades the longer you are in your relationship, as it has served its purpose biologically. Nevertheless, one thing we know for sure is that kissing boosts oxytocin (Love Hormone) and feelings of desire. And it is for that reason that you need to make an effort to keep the kissing alive with your partner.

I say, let’s bring back the enjoyment of Kisses again! And get you and your partner to reconnect with that young, fun, hormone-filled teenage inside and get your Kissin on.

Here’s a playful way to get started – Neck Kissing. ?

Let’s face it, for women and some men, this is one of the most intensely pleasurable areas of the body. Spend a little time here licking, kissing and light biting around the neck, jawline, clavicle bone and shoulders. ?

Embrace the playful teen inside you and surprise your lover with neck kisses ? However, if you are not there yet, that’s ok Gorgeous!

Here are a few tips that might help you bring kissing back into your relationship.

Dr John Gottman, PhD, the love and relationship researcher, has come up with one of the simplest ways for couples to revive kissing. It’s called The 6-second kiss! Why 6-seconds John Gottman says, “that is the amount of time it takes to make it long enough to feel romantic.” So within 6 seconds of kissing, you are boosting the love hormone.

John Gottman suggests couples start simply by sharing a 6-second kiss each day. And let the kiss speak for itself. What I mean is it doesn’t have to lead to sex, but if it does, great, but that’s not the goal here. The goal is to connect with your partner with a long slow, deep, soft kiss.

I understand that this may be a little awkward at first, and this FIFO lifestyle gets hectic, but this doesn’t mean you give up on kissing.

Here are a few tips to push through the uncomfortableness of kissing:

Set a kissing routine – Yes, setting a schedule to make time to kiss may sound unromantic; however, it will increase the love hormone creating a desire and excitement. If you and your partner decide to kiss for 6 seconds each day of your R&R, this will grow into a beautiful habit of making kissing a critical part of your relationship, and pretty soon you won’t need to schedule it.

Initiate Kissing More Often – If you are the one who wouldn’t usually initiate things and are unhappy with your relationship, take a little control, feel empowered and surprise your partner by making the first move. Stealing a few kisses now and then just might motivate your partner to do the same.

Experiment With Different Kissing Styles – One reason kissing fades in a relationship is that it becomes boring. The excitement and arousal were there at the beginning but faded away. Try experimenting with different kissing styles in different surroundings or situations you usually wouldn’t. Check out our blog – 14 Tongue Tingling Kisses to Seduce your Lover.

Talk About Your Kissing – Communication is the key to a happy relationship. Talk about any concern or feeling you may be experiencing about taking on this 6-second kissing challenge with your partner. Having a chat about kissing is an excellent way to find out exactly how your partner likes to be kissed, and you let them in on what your desires are.

If you both prioritise kissing and focus on being each other “ideal kisser,” you will soon become much more connected, appreciated and loved.

Added Bonus Did you know that A Minute Kiss Burns 26 Calories!

The next step is for you to try this every day of your next R&R together. Do you accept the 6-second kissing challenge?

If you accept this challenge and are willing to share, I’d like to hear how it goes.

Happy Kissing Gorgeous x

Real romance comes from the brain and this is how impacts your relationship

I am a True Romantic at Heart. But as life goes on and our lives get busier, Romance goes out the window, especial if our partner is hardly ever around. Sometimes you wonder if your partner even has a Romantic Bone in their body, so then, you stop trying! Here are a few things that I have come across in my reach regarding your biggest Love Organ.

That’s right, your Brain!!

Your heart is perhaps the organ most people associate with emotion, but your thoughts and the areas that recognise love are stored inside your head.

So for those who are lovers of True Romance, you are our Right-Brained Lovers.

The right-brained people tend to be creative and spontaneous. They feel first and think second.

You are incredibly intuitive, which means you can catch on quickly when your partner is feeling down suddenly. However, you need to be aware this can trick you into thinking you’re a mind-read or assume you know what is going on in your partner’s head even when you really don’t.

Here are a few tips to bring a little more Romance into your Relationship:

  • Appreciate your partner’s uniqueness
  • Right-Brained lovers take love seriously but have a great sense of humour.
  • Intimate love is their top priority – Make romantic gestures without ulterior motives.
  • Right-Brained Lovers are flexible
  • You will need to tap into their creativity regularly.
  • It is a pretty good mind-reader (incredibly intuitive)
  • They celebrate sexuality.
  • They see the world in a slightly unusual way.
  • They are open to both the masculine and the feminine.
  • Remembers essential dates and anniversaries
  • Maintains a deep, spiritual connection with their lover.
  • Is spontaneous.
  • They define themselves as a lover.
  • They are continuously learning and growing.

Left-brained people tend to be logical and practical. You think first and feel second.

You are going to need time to solve problems as they arise. As you are not impulsive, emotional, or reacting to anything, you will need to take a step back and think about things as they stand. As a left-brained person, a spontaneous date night is not your thing; you love to have a plan. But be aware that you will analyse everything.

Tips for Left-brain lovers to bring a little more romance into your relationship:

  • Increase the amount of fun you have together by 10%
  • Say “I love you”, or better still, say “I’m IN love with you” 300% more often.
  • Spend 10% as much time kissing as you spend watching TV or on your phone when home.
  • If you’re quiet by nature, open up a little and talk 20% more.
  • Listen to your partner by focusing 100% of your attention on them. (No multi-tasking)
  • Give up 10% of your downtime when home and give it to your partner.
  • Generate 33% more laughter in your life together.
  • Spend 15% more time together.
  • Reduce your complaining by 50%
  • Be 25% more creative in your relationship.
  • Reduce your criticising by 60%
  • If by nature you’re talkative, talk 20% less and listen 20% more
  • Be 11% more thoughtful and considerate.

So in short, the left brain analyzes, the right brain intuits; the left brain thinks, the right brain feels; the left brain is logical; the right brain is emotional.

Left-brian lovers can be incredibly romantic; however, it’s just that right-brain lovers are loader, creative and spontaneous at showing it. But then again, those logical types are great planners of surprises and are great at noticing little but essential things about their partners.

Start putting a few of these tips into action, and you with have a passionate summer with the love of your life!

Why is date night important in a relationship?

Why is Date Night important in a FIFO Relationship?

Keeping date night alive is essential to maintaining a strong, healthy and loving relationship. I feel date nights are essential to all types of relationships, couples who have been together for a long time and couples with children. However, after a decade of being a FIFO wife and working with many FIFO couples, it is essential for couples who are separated by work to make time for their relationship. Why? Because we don’t have face-to-face interactions with our partners to stay connected daily. We all want and need to keep our love tanks full, or better yet, have them overflowing, so that our time apart is more bearable.

Many couples come to me because they have found themselves falling out of love and falling into dangerous territory. However, in my 27-plus years of marriage and professional career working with couples, it’s not as easy to fall out of love when you spend quality time together. Date night keeps a relationship fun and joyous, providing a healthy balance with difficult times. Date night is a proactive way to continually create feel-good moments that help to keep a healthy solid connection.

It also stops you from using your R&R (together) time trying to reconnect but instead allows your relationship to flow, keeping your love tanks full. Dates night gives you new things to talk about when apart, keeping the lines of communication alive. And we all know how important communication is in a FIFO relationship.

Date Night Brings Back the Spark and keeps the Fire burning while apart!

For me, date night would take me into another world and remind me that I am a wife and not just a FIFO wife or mum of 3 trying her hardest to keep our household running smoothly. Date night ignites the sparkle in my eyes and in my heart. It gives me something to look forward to every R&R.

It makes the countdown exciting and helps me remember those beautiful feelings of our courtship days.

We often forget that a relationship needs to be nourished, and keeping all those feelings of love alive is an opportunity and the responsibility of both of you. You can’t just stop doing everything you used to do when you were courting and expect your relationship to stay strong and exciting. Your relationship needs constant nourishment emotionally, spiritually and sexually.

For many of us FIFO families, R&R is family time. But as a mum of 3, I would find myself longing for Fly-In Day, as I knew there was some much-needed downtime for me, for us. The heart of a strong family is a strong marriage/relationship where couples prioritise each other. Relationship/couple time is different from family time, so ensure that every R&R has a portion of family time and couple time.

Emotional intimacy and connection grow through regular date nights, it’s the fuel that makes you and your partner feel loved, cherished and desirable, especially while apart. Date night is not optional for FIFO couples who want to stay close and connected.

Date Night is Emotional Foreplay for a FIFO Relationship…

Date night grows the emotional connection between couples, allowing all those days apart to wash away any feeling of disconnect FIFO has created. It is an essential part of emotional foreplay, which many women need to feel close to their partner and stop them from feeling lonely in their FIFO relationship. This emotional closeness makes it easier for her to move from feeling emotionally intimate to wanting to be physically intimate long after the fly-in day has faded.

It is essential not to have “string attached” to your date night as this will lead to disappointment and undo all the wonderful positive feelings your date night has created. Nobody wants to feel as though they are being “wined and dined” because of something that is expected in return. Just enjoy each other and focus on building your connection. And your time together will take care of itself! (wink wink)

Just Enjoy Each Other – Some of my favourite dates were when we would put the kids to bed a little early and snuggle up on the lounge watching a movie, or we sat outside with a few drinking and chatting away as if the distance of FIFO never existed.

Whether your date nights are an evening dinner date, a lunch date during the week, or even just time spent together after the kids are in bed, this time is gold and sacred.

If you are not having at least one date when on R&R, now is the time to start adding a little emotional foreplay to your relationship by booking a date night or two. Whatever you decide to do on your dates, just enjoy each other and reconnect with WHY you dated and fell in love with each other in the first place.

Love is in the Air Free Printable’s

Happy Valentine’s Day, Gorgeous,

Love a Romantic Freebie to keep the love sizzling this month?

Keep Ready, Gorgeous a lovely FREE gift awaits you.

Experienced as I am as a FIFO wife and coach, one thing I noticed is anytime you have a special event; often we have to turn it into a month of celebrating or a fun countdown to the closest R&R. Sadly, one day can create so much press on couples, feeling disappointment because you’re not together, which leads to communication breakdown and arguments. Instead, celebrate your love the whole month – Love from afar (apart) and then together with a Romance R&R.

So with this in mind, I created this free e-book so you, too, can stay connected to your partner during this romantic time. It is filled with fun, inspirational ideas and printable goodies to print off… And Send it Immediately!

I created this free printable book, especially for you. I decided to share some of my printable, fun, inspirational DIY ideas to make your FIFO Lovers Valentines a little extra sweet. I know Valentine’s day is only a few sleeps away, but I say it’s never too late for romance and make it a month of Loving.  Stay connected this month with these quick and easy ideas which will mean so much to your lover.

A FIFO Valentine’s day can be stressful, but it doesn’t have to be! This e-book provides easy action steps and printables to take the stress away and allow you to stay connected and keep the love alive this February.

This 11-page book is packed with fun ideas which include:

Sweet loving pre-made Love notes or create your own with 17 fun-loving ideas. Use these adorable love coupons to fill your “Open When” love letter for your sweetie.

Playful Word Search… tell your lover how sweet their kisses are in this playful word search and recreate the fun by trying some on your next R&R {wink wink}

Deepen the Love… With 17 conversation starters to deepen your level of intimacy this valentine’s day.

16 romantic text messages – Use them to start a fun Valentine’s countdown and make your lover smile through the hard days or be a little playful and see what cheeky fun could be had this month of Love! {wink wink}

Filled with Be Mine, Cupid’s Wish, Love Bonus, and so much more playful romance…

Grab your FREE 11-page Printable Today

And give your lover a sizzling gift of love from afar to remember! Well, until the next R&R!

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A Christmas Romance Free Printable’s

A Christmas Romance Banner

Merry Christmas, Gorgeous,

Happy young woman having Christmas video chat with lover

Being in a FIFO relationship is hard, especially at this time of year. For some of us, we have our partner’s home, and for the rest of us, we have to think outside the box to make Christmas a little extra special for our partner who won’t be home.

If you, like me, are always looking for fun ideas to keep the connection alive while apart but find the internet search overwhelming and don’t know where to start or what to start with! You can stop your search here because I’ve created the perfect FIFO Christmas gift experience for you and your partner.

The Best Part? It’s FREE!!!!

I created this free printable book, especially for you. I decided to share some of my printable fun, inspirational DIY ideas to make your FIFO Lovers Christmas a little extra special.

Stay connected this Christmas with these quick and easy ideas which will mean so much to your lover.

A Fifo Christmas can be stressful, but it doesn’t have to be! This e-book provides easy action steps and printables to take the stress away and allow you to stay connected and keep the love alive this Christmas.

This 14-page book is packed with fun ideas which include:

Christmas together. Top view of Christmas decorations and photograph in picture frame laying on the rustic wooden grain

Jaw-dropping pre-made Love Coupons or create your own with 20 fun-loving ideas. Use these adorable love coupons to fill your “Open When” love letter for your sweetie.

Playful DIY Stocking Stuffers Ideas… You will love these easy-to-create playful stocking stuffers – and so will your lover. {wink wink}

Cheeky Kiss-mas Ideas for under the mistletoe – ask your lover to pick one to try next R&R and make their eyes light up with excitement!

Being Naughty feels Oh so Nice… It’s time to create your Naughty and Nice Wish List. Describe your cheekiest Christmas fantasies in every naughty or nice detail, so your lover can make your wishes come true next R&R.

 25 fun and cheeky Christmas text messages – Use them to start a fun Christmas countdown and make your lover smile through the hard days or be a little playful and see what cheeky fun could be had this Christmas eve! {wink wink} 

And so much more…

Grab your FREE 14-page Printable Today and give your lover’s a merry gift of love from afar to remember! Well, until the next R&R!

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Join our Facebook group design to support your FIFO relationships.. like to know more, click below.

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14 Tongue Tingling Kisses to Seduce your Lover

“Life, the gift of nature, Love, the gift of life, a Kiss, the gift of Love.”-Unknown

Let’s face it, a great kiss feels good. It makes the world disappear (even if it’s just for a moment) and fills our hearts with desire.

Did you know?
 The average person will spend an estimated 20,160 minutes kissing in their lifetime
 50% of all people have their first kiss before they are 14
 You burn 26 calories in a one-minute passionate kiss… love to kissercise!!!
 53% of women prefer kissing a clean shaven man
 Kissing releases the same neurotransmitters (chemical messengers in the brain) as those that are released when you engage in intense exercises such as running a marathon or skydiving. This causes your heart to beat faster and your breathing to become deep and irregular.
 Lowers Stress and Anxiety by decreasing the stress hormone and has similar benefits to mediation. I say YES to more kissing!
 When kissing, the oxytocin (Love Hormone) levels increase which calms us and simulates pleasure which strengthens our relationship
 Happiness is a kiss away – kissing increases endorphins, our feel-good hormone. Making us feel happier, you feel relaxed, refreshed and revitalised

“One kiss breaches the distance between friendship and love.”- Anonymous

Kissing plays a huge part in our life. We all remember our first passionate kiss, and we kiss to keep our long-term relationship alive. Studies have shown that we use kissing to choose a suitable partner. Kissing is more important to women than to men. Women are more likely to see kissing as a way to monitor their long-term relationships.

The studies also revealed that it is important for men to have healthy mouths. The breath and taste of a man’s kiss are highly important in determining if she will keep kissing him in the moment or the future.

Women value the experience of kissing much more than a man. Men are more likely to see kissing as a step towards sex. Men, when kissing, are more interested in facial and bodily attractiveness.

These studies when into more scientific research, but in short, these are the best tips from the art of kissing:

Tips for women:
  The study show men want us women to open our month more…. Men prefer wetter kisses with lots more tongue action
And of course, they want us to initiate more
They want us to stop holding back…. Be more aggressive with your tongue and actively participate in the kiss.

Tips for Men:
 Women like a clean month; she doesn’t want to taste what you had for lunch. Carry mints or use mouthwash before going in for the kiss. Women depend heavily on taste and smell… kissing is an experience for her, so take her on your pleasure journey.
 Women don’t like it when you stuff your tongue down her throat. You are kissing her, not trying to impregnate her with your tongue.
Allow her to breath; we enjoy kissing more if we are not being suffocated.
Listen and feel the way she is kissing. Matching her tempo will create a desire which will allow her to become comfortable with the tongue action you want from her.

96% of Women studied prefer the neck as a second spot to kiss, while only 10% of men do. Women also stated in the studies they would like to be kissed in several different places and styles of kisses.

So with this in mind, it’s time to be creative and start playing… below are a few fun ways to get your tingling tongue in action.

It’s time to Pucker up…

  1. Public Kiss – Not everyone likes the idea of being an exhibitionist. But kissing in public is a declaration of your love, and this act of freedom can be one big turn-on! Instead of going out to dinner, why not try happy hour?
  2. Ice Kiss – Suck on an ice cube until your mouth becomes cold. Remove the cube or exchange it back and forth between you and your partner’s mouth. Allow your cold kisses to trace other parts of the body.
  3. Eyes Wide Open -Try experiencing a passionate kiss with your eyes open and see what happens; it can be both tender and erotic. Sit in front of each other with your legs wrapped around each other’s hips. Listen to each other’s breathing. Once you are in tune with your lover’s breathing, draw your eyes up to meet their eyes. Just continue to listen to their breathing and when ready lean in and begin the kiss… keep staring into their eyes.
  4. Pash-A-Thon – Passionately kiss your lover for at least five minutes longer than usual.
  5. Goodbye Kiss take 2 – We cover this one in my How to make saying Goodbye a Little Easier – Say goodbye to your lover with a quick kiss. As they turn to leave, pull them back for a second, more passionate kiss and include a squeeze of their sexy sweet cheek.
  6. Nibble Nibble – For some, the ear can be very seductive – suck, nibble and tug lightly. Breathe softly into them and whisper something sexy.
  7. Downward Kiss – We just found out that 96% of women and 10% of men like the neck to be kissed. So spend a little time here licking, kissing and light biting around the neck, jawline and shoulders. Have fun, as this is one of the most intensely pleasurable areas of the body.

Let’s Spice it Up….

  1. Angel’s Wing Kiss – Take a piece of ice and place it in the small of your lover’s back. Slowly move the ice up their back to the shoulder blades. End the kiss by gently sucking until the ice melts. Get your partner to try it on you… Think about it, the warmth of his breath upon your skin. The tingling feeling of goosebumps all over your body, feel the excitement… Is it the ice or his touch?
  2. Back Kiss – Remove your lover’s shirt and have them lie down on their stomach. Sit comfortably over your lover’s lower back. Now begin kissing from the neck all the way down their back while softly licking and breathing where you have kissed. This will give your lover cold shivers and can be very exciting. It works very well by adding sweet and playful edible strawberry honey dust. As it adds a little something extra to your kiss, leaving you wanting to kiss your partner more.
  3. Take My Breath Away  – While kissing with a little bit of tongue, you blow into your lover’s mouth, causing their cheeks to poof up! It’s so much fun, and it will make your lover giggle. Don’t blow too hard! This is a cheeky way to start the fun and let your lover know you’re in a playful mood.
  4. Bubble-licious Kiss – Blow a bubble with your favourite bubble gum. Then ask your lover to put their mouth over the bubble and start kissing. This kiss is a lot of fun if you can get passed the giggling, not to mention how yummy it tastes.
  5. Tease Me – If you’re feeling adventurous, try gentle biting to add arousal. Be sure you’re gentle; this passionate gesture can bring out the animal in you.
  6. Bubble Bath Kiss – Fill the bathtub with warm water and lots of bubble baths. While in the bath together, wash and kiss each other simultaneously. You and your lover will both love it, which can lead to even more fun things. Add some sweet-smelling bath salt that is perfect for this kiss, as the beautiful fragrance will help to create a romantic bath time. Turn the phone off, adds some softly lit candles, and the night is yours!!!!
  7. Fireworks Kiss – You need a bag of popping candy. Place a small handful in your mouth and begin kissing your lover… Wait for it…your begin to feel a French kiss explosion! Mmmm…  If you can’t find popping candy try a fruit tingle. Just crush it up a little first and kiss away. Mouth-watering fun!

“Kissing is like drinking salted water. You drink, and your thirst increases.” – Chinese Proverb

Kissing is a great way to initiate a romantic together without having to say a word. It’s a beautiful way to show your lover how much you love them. There are plenty more benefits to kissing. I’m guessing you already have your favourite reasons, so share them with your lover today. As you now have 14 new ways to add fireworks to your kiss. So start kissing away the stress of FIFO and get your tongues tingling with desire on your next RnR.

Lots of love and kisses xoxo

How to make saying Goodbye a Little Easier

One of the downsides to the FIFO lifestyle is having to say goodbye every few weeks or, in my case, every 11 days… Being in a DIDO/FIFO relationship for a decade now, I understand how time flies when your partner is home. You’re excited to see them walk through the door. Next, your love them being there when you wake up, then you blink, and they’re packing their bags, and we saying goodbye.

Emotionally, saying goodbye in this lifestyle can be one of our most challenging things. Their home time never feels long enough. Yes, we survive it… we stay strong and keep ourselves busy until the next RNR. We know going into this lifestyle is part of the routine, but it doesn’t make it any easier.

Believe me, after 10 years, I still have days where it’s hard to say those words and smile through the tears. This has allowed me to see that we are very much in LOVE…. if I didn’t feel this way, then it wouldn’t hurt or be hard to part.

Knowing that my partner somehow hates the goodbye reassures me that we are ok in this lifestyle and that our love for each other is stronger than the distance.

For me, this is something to be very proud of. As many couples are not in this lifestyle, see their partner every day and don’t get to feel or have the gentle reminder of how in love they really are… but that is a whole other conversation, which I will save for another day.

Saying goodbye to your partner doesn’t mean we are saying goodbye to our relationship.

It’s just the nature of our relationship while in this lifestyle. The change from being a physical relationship (Kissing, cuddling etc) to one that is more communication (phone calls, texting, skype etc), which can be fun!

By having both physical and distance, we learn more about ourselves and our relationship much faster, creating a stronger bond or connection. A non-fifo relationship doesn’t get to experience both physical and non-physical, or if they do experience it, it’s usually not over a long period of time, so the positive impact of missing their partner can be short-lived.

In the urban dictionary, “goodbye” means “Leaving someone or something, and sometimes never seeing them again.”

I thought I would share my tips on saying goodbye a little easier.

Try not to say the word goodbye, as it has a final ending feeling to it, so formal. It can also reinforce our subconscious mind that this is the end, connecting it to our relationship because one partner is leaving the other.

Keep it casual and try to use words like:

Talk to you tonight
See you later
See you soon.
Have a good day or night
Take care
Catch you later
Bye for now
Safe travel
Until we meet again 😉

Keep it fun by saying:
Peace out babe
Smell you later
Toodle-oo
See you later alligator
Give em hell
Happy trails
Adios (Spanish word)

You could channel your inner 50 shades by saying:

Laters baby
Spank you later baby

And add a wink or two!!!

Romantic goodbye:
I’ll dream of you
I’ll see you in my dreams
Au revoir (French always sounds romantic)

Keeping your goodbyes playful helps keep the love, desire, and flirty fun alive. Keeping the feeling of love and desire alive while apart, in short, creates a sense of wanting in the partner who is away… creates a desire or yearning to be with you… I will share more about desire another day.

Little tip: for those who want to try the cheeky goodbye… maintain eye contact, get into their personal space… get in real close and go in for the hug; linger a few seconds longer and if you feeling really playful or want them to have something to think about on their way back to camp… either go in for the killer kiss or squeeze their sexy sweet cheek… (Yes, I mean their cute ass!) Now don’t say a word if they ask what’s that for… just wink and say your version of good-bye, “Until we meet again or Laters baby” If this is something you don’t normally do, it will surprise them, and they will LOVE IT!

So before you both zoom off into the world, take a minute to communicate how much you enjoyed your time together. Make a date for your next call to touch base, as this helps you feel connected with each other. Follow this with a minimum six-second kiss. Kissing is an act of emotion, and adding a six-second kiss creates or seals an emotional connection, a bond between two people.

Saying goodbye is an unavoidable part of FIFO relationships. Remember that the time spent apart allows you to appreciate your time together. So, however you say goodbye, remember to keep it fun and playful, as it’s not forever!

Later’s Baby
 xoxo

7 Tips to create a happy healthy fifo relationship

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